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Low Carb Christmas
03:58
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There’ll be mayanonise packages shaped like candy cane
And ginger bacon houses topped with whipping cream (whipping cream)
And cured meats making up all the nativity scene
‘Cept the little baby Jesus made of cheese
It’ll be a low, a low carb Christmas this year
And it’ll be a low, a low carb Christmas this year
Cauliflower croutons and some keto bread
Almond flour pastries with dark chocolate (so sweet but kind of not)
And two chicken breasts atop the tree like angel wings
And that little baby Jesus made of triple crème brie
It’ll be a low, a low carb Christmas this year
And it’ll be a low, a low carb Christmas this year
My hypertension means I’ve gotta give em’ up (gotta give em’ up)
So no more stuffing put more turkey in my mouth (turkey in his mouth)
Hold the beer – I’ll drink some soda water
It’ll be a low, a low carb Christmas this year
And it’ll be a low, a low carb Christmas this year
Josh: What’s he gonna make us sing about next year, a Keto Christmas?
Emily: Yeah or something stupid like potato diet!
Josh: Though it does have that allit-alliterative-alliterative title. So there’s that.
Emily: Yeah I guess, well, hmph. If they cut out sugar, and like sweets and treats – I’m out!
Josh: A sugar free Christmas? Nah!
Emily: No thank you!
*Laughter*
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*Christmastime is for memories!*
Once in Danny’s dirty shack
Stood a broken shower head
Where that man suggested bathing
Jets turned water brown-y red
Rotting drywall through the house
In the floor a decomposing mouse
Once in Danny’s dirty shack
Lay a countertop that was detached
Blackened carpet didn’t even match
The dishwasher unplugged in the back
Unsound structure, barely stood
For North Van the rent was pretty good
*Christmastime is the time to be present, to be presented with presents, in the presence of those you love.*
In Danny’s dirty kitchen
Checkerboard tiles were worn
Smells of foofs did linger
A feeling so forlorn
Mac & cheese did we cook there
Chicken breasts galore
In Danny’s dirty kitchen
Where we live no more
*Christmastime is about looking to the future, for after all, that’s where our hopes and dreams come to life.*
Said the dumb Plataunto to the Gabbergash
“Do you smell what I smell? (do you smell what I smell?)”
It’s not what Ploti left there floating in the back
“Do you smell what I smell? (do you smell what I smell?)”
A clove, a clove – many garlic cloves
Wititich was cooking in droves
Wititich he cooked many cloves
Once in Danny’s dirty shack/In Danny’s dirty kitchen/Do you smell what I smell?
*Christmastime is a time that we all spend together. It’s nice to be important, but it’s more important to be nice.*
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Shack 25 North Vancouver, British Columbia
Shack 25 is:
Emily Brown
Bryan B
Joshua Denny-Keys
Austen
Renaud
When three musical geniuses set up shop in a dusty, broken down shack for the school year, the results could be catastrophic. And they were...
...though times have changed, and they no longer live together, Shack 25 lives on, now joined by the most frequented shack visitor.
... more
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